I was just practicing the ancient Japanese art of karaoke. . . .

Day 1 - A photo of yourself and a description of how your day was.

Well it's Tuesday which means my boss is in town so my day was just ok.  As opposed to most days when my boss is working 2 hours away so I know he can't just pop in on me and catch me on Facebook, Netflix, or catching up with all my bloggy friends (not that I do ANY of those on company time).

Tuesday also means karaoke at Applebee's.  It's a tradition like apple pie, or sparklers in July.  There's a lot of regulars that come to karaoke every Tuesday.  My favorites are Wyatt and Alexis.  Wyatt because he sings songs like Celine Dion "It's all coming back to me now".  You have to love that.  He sings good enough to put on a show but doesn't take himself seriously.  He is literally a superstar at karaoke, everyone loves him and you'll know when he shows up because the DJ will give one of these "Wyatt is in the house everybody" and everyone cheers.  Freakin.  Hilarious.  Alexis on the other hand sings like she's expecting feedback from Randy, Steven, and JLo.  She works the whole waving hand and winking at the crowd.  It gets uncomfortable if your too close.  It's Applebee's sweetie, no one's getting the golden ticket to Hollywood here.

What is a date, really, but a job interview. . . .

This weekend I was asked out on 4 dates.  4!  I haven't been on 4 dates this entire year (I don't count "hangouts") and now 4 in one weekend???  But, it all went downhill very quickly.  Let me start from the beginning. . . .

Guy #1 – Technically this was not a date, but I’m counting it because this is my blog and we live by my rules around here.  #1 asks me to go to his family’s cabin for “some or all” of the weekend.  It was a big group thing, he had invited several other people (see not a date) and I really, really wanted to go.  In fact I made a plan to go Friday night and then things just didn’t work out that I could go.  I hate when things don’t work out.

Guy #2 – Some guy who I have seen around town but never met messaged me on FB

“How are you?  Want to get together and drink some beers?”

Seriously dude?  Know your audience.

Guy #3 – Technically this wasn’t a date either although I’m almost certain he would have bought me dinner first.  One of my “friends” (I’ll be reevaluating our friendship after this incident) birthday is on Tuesday and he asked me if I wanted to go to Mesquite and have “birthday sex” with him.   Of course this was AFTER another girl canceled on him.  I told him I was nobody’s back up plan (among several other reasons why we would never be having birthday sex) and he said “no big” and went into some story about how many girls want him and I pretended my cell phone cut out and hung up on him.  I win!

Guy #4 – Seriously, this was doomed from the beginning.  First, I met him online which I didn’t want to participate in anyway.  Second we had been messaging each other for weeks and didn’t really have a lot to say to one another.  I thought once we met in person it would be better.  Wrong.  But that was just the first of many wrongs for this date:

*I'm pretty sure his shirt had been in the laundry hamper with all the other dirty ones for at least 4 days.

*He talked about washing his truck in booty shorts, more than twice.

*He told a few racial jokes.  Even after I didn’t laugh at the first one.

*When he walked me to my truck I was too distracted by the crumbs on his shirt to have an actual conversation.

I kept thinking “he can’t possibly think this is going good”.

Oh but he did.  He kept talking about how he wanted to go out again.

APPLICATION DENIED.

Naturally, I went home and ate half a pan of brownies and drank milk straight from the carton. 

30 Day Blog Challenge, take 2. . . .

I just love these, mainly because I'm lazy and this makes blogging so easy.  Hopefully this one is easier than 30 Days of Truth because some of those were deep!

Day 1 - A photo of yourself and a description of how your day was.
Day 2 - A photo of something you ate today.
Day 3 - Your idea of the perfect first date.
Day 4 - Your favorite photograph of your best friend.
Day 5 - A photo of yourself two years ago.
Day 6 - A photo of an animal you'd love to keep as a pet.
Day 7 - Your dream wedding.
Day 8 - A song to match your mood.
Day 9 - A photo of the item you last purchased.
Day 10 - A photo of your favourite place to eat.
Day 11 - What's in your makeup bag.
Day 12 - A photograph of the town you live in.
Day 13 - Your favorite musician and why?
Day 14 - A TV show you're currently addicted to.
Day 15 - Something you don't leave the house without.
Day 16 - Your celebrity crush.
Day 17 - A photo of you and your family.
Day 18 - Something you crave a lot.
Day 19 - Another picture of yourself.
Day 20 - The meaning behind your blog name.
Day 21 - A photo of something that makes you happy.
Day 22 - A letter to someone who has hurt you recently.
Day 23 - 15 facts about you.
Day 24 - A photo of something that means a lot to you.
Day 25 - What's in your purse?
Day 26 - A photo of somewhere you've been to.
Day 27 - A picture of you last year and now and how you changed since then?
Day 28 - Your favorite movie.
Day 29 - Something you could never get tired of doing.
Day 30 - A photograph of yourself today + three good things that have happened in the past 30 days.

Anyone else want to participate??

Suit up. . . .

*  A very dear, dear friend lent me seasons 1 & 2 of 'How I met your mother'.

*  Seriously. Freakin. Hilarious.

*  I never watched this show because I'm not a huge fan of Doogie Howser.

*  But seriously he is so freakin funny in this show and I can really relate to him.

*  Such as 'The Lemon Law'

*  I joined a new dating site and one of the questions was "do you have a car?"

*  Seriously?

*  So I put no....just to mess with people.

*  Does that put me below the Vickie Mendoza Diagonal?

*  Is there really someone out there going "I found the perfect girl but, she doesn't have a car so it would never work out."

*  Tomorrow night is my first date with someone I met online.

*  I'll let you know if I'm forced to invoke the Lemon Law.

You know when it's real....

Today for lunch I went to Wendy's and ordered off the dollar menu because I'm poor and that's what poor people do.  So I got some spicy chicken nuggets and fries and then proceeded to count out $2.12 from the ash tray.

What's weird is I pay with change all the time because I hate change so it get's built up in my wallet and then I have to use it or my wallet won't close.  But sometimes I feel like the drive thru person is judging me and I should say something like "oh I just don't want to break my $100 for this".  Then I remember that they work at a drive thru.  I have a love, hate relationship with the drive thru.  They give me food, which I love.  It's just not usually the food I ordered, which I hate.

So my point is this.  Just because payday is Monday, sometimes your boss doesn't feel like signing checks until Wednesday.  If my boss had signed paychecks on time, I would have deposited my check before 2pm, then my funds would be available for me to use.  And don't even get me started on why the banks can't make funds available when the check you've deposited is from their bank.  That's just a whole other pandora's box that we're not going to explore today.

And another thing, does anyone know why the spicy chicken nuggets are $.99 but the regular nuggets are $1.29?  WTF Wendy?

WWTK, Superhero edition....

 

{1} Who would you call if you had to get bailed out of jail?
Depends on what I was in jail for.  If it was something insignificant or a misunderstanding then I'd call my mom.  If I really messed up big time (which is soooo unlike me) then I'd probably just sit in jail until someone finally volunteered to come bail my worthless butt out.

{2} If you were a superhero what would your hero name be?
Hmmmm....I don't know what my name would be, but.... I would be a Nascar superhero.  My costume would be a fire suit.  My sidekick would be my dog.  My super powers would be to be invisible, communicate with the animal kingdom, and obviously skilled at driving fast cars.  My ride would be Dale Jr's grey ghost car.

Not that I've thought about that or anything....

{3} What do you think is one of your best qualities?
I think I'm pretty level headed.  I attribute this to my mother who would never fight with me.  When I was a teenager and would get mad and throw a fit yelling and screaming because I wasn't getting my way, she never fought back.  She would just laugh at me.  Which would royally tick me off to no end!!  But then, I learned I could do that to other people.  Let them carry the anger around because I don't have the time to deal with it. 

{4} What song would you pick to be your own personal theme song? 
Just in case my whole Nascar superhero plan materializes, this would be my theme song.

{5} What celebrity do you think is most over rated?
Paris Hilton.  It gives me joy when I see that her new reality show is tanking (does this make me a bad person?).  That's one show I'll never watch.  I saw a few episodes of the show she and Nicole Richie did a long time ago and thought she was so conceited and took advantage of those people who took her in.  And there's just something not right about a person whose catch phrase is "That's hot"....and they say it All. The. Freaking. Time.  

All you have to do is call my name and I'll be there, on the next train....

I confess. . . .

* Since I'm too poor to afford cable tv, I've been checking out dvd's from the library.

* I mean I have quite an extensive dvd collection at home but I can only watch 'Talladega Nights' so many times in a one week period.

* They actually have a really good selection of shows I haven't seen before and it's nice to not have to wait a whole week for the next episode.

* It's like on Saturday's or before a new season starts and they have the all day marathon but you can have your own marathon whenever you feel like watching the show.

* As a side note if you read my post the other day you'll find this funny....or not so funny.  As I was walking into the library to get my dvd's a man was getting out of his car and as he started to walk he yelled back at his young (probably 7ish) daughter to hurry along.  She (no lie) says "Holy shit dad I'm going as fast as I can."  Then he says..."what did I tell you about swearing DAMMIT!". 

* I did not even try to hide my laughter.  He looked at me all embarrassed and I gave him this "wonder where she learned that from" look.

* Anyhooo....

* So for the last few months I've been watching 'Gilmore Girls'

* I've seen a lot of reruns when I was rich enough to afford cable tv, but never in sequence and not EVERY episode.

* I've been dying since season 1 for Luke and Lorelai to get together.

* They strung this bad boy out worse than Ross and Rachel.

* Now they are finally together and I realize there are only 2 more seasons left.

* wtf WB, wtf?  You just wasted 5 seasons when we could have been watching this....